The good old days were always better because you don’t have to live with them
SNAPTAIL THE BABY SHARK and her grandpa Sawtooth broke free of the frenzy and swam toward the shore. When I say “baby shark,” I’m speaking relatively because Snaptail was a Greenland shark and Greenland sharks live as long as five hundred years. Which was almost how old grandpa shark was. Snaptail shark just turned ten (although sharks don’t keep track of birthdays, not having calendars to mark on).
Speaking of snacks, Sawtooth spotted a pair of legs treading in the deep water twenty yards off the beach. He snatched an ankle and dragged the swimmer underwater, carrying him back to where Snaptail waited. Sawtooth immediately tore into the morsel and had devoured half when he realized Snaptail was circling patiently.
“Haven’t you tried human before, girl? Have a bite. I’m too old to gobble the whole thing.”
Sawtooth spotted a pair of legs treading in the deep water twenty yards off the beach. He snatched an ankle and dragged the swimmer underwater, carrying him back to where Snaptail waited.
So Snaptail chomped on the swimmer’s midsection, and immediately spit the bite back into the water. “That tastes awful, grandpa.”
“Sure does,” Grandpa said. “But someone’s got to eat them.”
Snaptail sniffed at the chunk of people meat she’d spit to the ocean floor. Gross. “Grandpa, why would you want to eat something that tastes so foul?”
Sawtooth ripped the spine from the remains and let it sink into the murky waters. “The fat ones aren’t so bad. This one’s old and tough. But slow. Easy to catch.”
“That doesn’t answer my question, grandpa? Why bother to eat them at all?”
Grandpa motioned to the shore with his arthritic right fin. “Snaptail, I’ve been patrolling this shore for hundreds of changes in the seasons. Did you know there once was a time when the humans didn’t crowd the shore, splash the water, and scare away our food supply?”
Sawtooth ripped the spine from the remains and let it sink into the murky waters. “The fat ones aren’t so bad. This one’s old and tough. But slow. Easy to catch.”
Snaptail imagined a beach with no humans throwing their trash in the waters and covering their bodies with smelly grease. “Those must have been wonderful times, grandpa.”
Sawtooth nodded toward another human who’d wandered too far from the shore. “I’m not feeding, sweetie. This is pest control.”
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